Nowadays with books like beautiful disaster and the internationally acclaimed fifty shades of grey around,many women both young and old are dying to have boyfriends and husbands who are over possessive. Please note that there is nothing wrong with being possessive, it shows you care about someone or something.

if you are in a relationship and your partner is never jealous or possessive, quietly breakup that relationship because that’s a sign that the love is dead.

But we ladies seem to overlook the dangers of men been over possessive.Men are generally possessive,they have this alpha male thing about them,But remember that too much of everything is bad. it’s important that your man is being possessive of you. Before we look into the dangers let’s find out signs we must know.


  • when he wants to know your where about all the time.
  •  he follows your around like a personal body guard.
  • when he calls you like 30 times a day.
  • he tells you what or what not to wear.
  •  when he sends his friends to spy on you.
  • you are his only friend and he blackmails you with that.
  •  he picks a fight with every guy that talks to you.
  • when he is secretly or openly checking your call log and messages.
  •  he hits you because you are talking to other men.
  • when he doesn’t allow you to go out and interact with others.
  •  he forces you to do things against your will.
  • when he locks you up for disobeying him.
  • he accuses you of lying and having affair with other men all the time

The above is just few of the signs to know when your man is over possessive.

know that they is a big difference between fiction and reality don’t be deceived.

13 Warning Signs That He Is Over Possessive


As I said before many women over look the dangers of over-possessiveness to fulfill their christian Grey fantasy. Remember that it’s just fiction. Being Over possessive can lead to physical and verbal abuse even when you feel you are obeying him. over possessiveness is the sister to obsession.

I heard a story of a man who poured a dangerous substance that disfigured the wife’s face because she was pretty and he didn’t want men staring at her. You are probably shaking your head, and asking what devil possessed this man. This starts slowly until it consumes. Some men have a personality disorder and this can lead to over possessiveness, like a man who killed his girlfriend and then himself because she broke up with him,so that they could continue their relationship in heaven? I would love for you to sit down and ask your self these questions.

  • Can I cope with a man who hits me?
  • Am I ready to wear only what he wants?
  • Can i bear the shame of having him fighting every one?
  • Am i ready to be a slave?
  • Can i raise my children in a violent home?

Don’t let love blind you. A man who hits you is not worth it

Your answer to the above will determine whether you want out. I have seen many women who are miserable because of this kind of relationship and there are  afraid to leave.

Are men over possessive?

It is very important to pay attention to the attitude of the man asking you out before you agree to date him. If you notice any of this run like the wind to avoid had I know

  • when he is trying so hard to hold your hand in public.
  • if he is violent and rude to people.
  •  if he sends you offensive text messages when you forget to call back or reply.
  • when  he is constantly asking you who you are talking to on the phone when he called.
  •  he makes sure that no other man talks to you.
  • if you catch him secretly spying on you while you undress or from afar

The above could manifest it’s self in the first few dates. note that some men can hide their other side to get what they want so be careful. Get to know a person before you start dating. Now you are already in this kind of relationship and you don’t know what to do you are unhappy and don’t know how to deal with it? That shall be discussed in my next article.  you an read that article here

I would love to know what you think. comment below.


  1. Trust is paramount in any relationship. I am not an expert when it comes to these but I would agree with Frank. Sometimes it boils down to family history and not being able to have an ideal family structure which led a man or even a woman, per se, to be extremely possessive. Thanks for sharing this post.

  2. over possessiveness is not bad in relationship but when it reach rising your hand to beat a woman i think it has reach it extreme level, and any man that beat a woman is not worth having her.

  3. Most men are rash and their actions may be termed over possessive but, more often than not, it’s not their fault. A lot of the time, it is due to home violence, lack of parental training and broken homes. Of course when one grows up not trusting their parents, it becomes difficult trusting anyone for that matter.

  4. I think over possessiveness is bad cos it could drive some of us crazy… but I believe in a relationship if you really love him. You gat to make him trust you. Trust matters for me. If there’s trust why would he want to be over possessive.

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